23 Adult Truths!

I can’t take credit for this.  I received it in email, author unknown.   Funny though, so please enjoy:

23 Adult Truths

1.  Sometimes I’ll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not
know what time it is.

2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize
you’re wrong.

3. I totally take back all those times I didn’t want to nap when I was

4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.

5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a  fitted sheet?

6. Was learning cursive really necessary?

7. Map  Quest really needs to start their directions on # 5. I’m pretty
sure I know  how to get out of my neighborhood.

8. Obituaries would be a lot more  interesting if they told you how the
person died.

9. I can’t remember the last time I wasn’t at least kind-of tired.

10. Bad decisions make good stories.

11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work
when you know that you just aren’t going to do anything  productive for the
rest of the day.

12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don’t
want to have to restart my collection…again.

13. I’m always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me
if I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical  report that I swear I
did not make any changes to.

14. I keep some people’s phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to
answer when they call.

15. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

16. I  disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or
Saturday night  more kisses begin with Miller Light than Kay.

17. I wish Google Maps  had an “Avoid Ghetto” routing option.

18. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and

19. How many times is it appropriate to say “What?” before you just nod
and smile because you still didn’t hear or understand a word they said?

20. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to
prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and

21.  Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty,
and you can wear them forever.

22. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car
keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey
– but I’d bet everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet
away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time.

23. The first testicular guard, the “Cup,” was used in  Hockey in 1874 and
the first helmet in Hockey was used in 1974. That means it only took
100 years for men to realize that their brain is also  important